For some it may come easy within the first couple days, for some it may take years, and for some they may never feel ready. It is completely up to you to write or not write and it's important to make that decision at your own pace.
Infinite Legacy's Family Services Department facilitates all correspondence between donor families and transplant recipients and our team is here to support you in the process. We can answer questions, discuss your feelings about taking this step and help you write your card or letter. If you have questions or concerns, please contact us at 410-242-7000 or aftercare@infinitelegacy.org.
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Tips on Writing Your Letter
- Donor family members often choose to write to recipients to tell a little about their loved one, their family, hobbies, occupation, etc. We've heard recipients welcome and appreciate these details.
- Until you get a feel for your loved one's transplant recipients and for how you feel about corresponding with them, we recommend you do not disclose any identifying or direct contact information. While Infinite Legacy does not restrict sharing identifying or direct contact information, we do want to make sure you have considered all of the potential outcomes of making such a disclosure.
- Infinite Legacy works closely with other donor programs and transplant centers to ensure recipients are ready to receive your letters prior to sending them. If we receive feedback the recipient is not ready to correspond, we will immediately contact you to discuss the next steps. Also, please know we will never forward a letter directly to you without confirming with you that you would like to receive it.
- Due to increasing use of social media sites and other online search capabilities, the range of information making you "identifiable" has greatly increased. If you disclose the same information that you have written on a Facebook page, blog or online obituary, your recipient may be able to locate you through the internet.
- After your initial letter is written and forwarded to the recipient, you may feel somewhat anxious about whether or not you will hear back. Although many families do hear back from their loved one's recipients, there is no guarantee you will receive a response. Should your loved one's recipient choose not to write to you at this time, please do not take this inaction personally. In addition to the task of physically recovering from their transplant, many recipients are dealing with a complex range of emotions.